A memory about my mother

In this case, this isnt' my memory, but memories shared by one of my mother's best friends. This is from an email sent a couple of weeks after Mother died. I've saved a printed version of this email but I want to make sure I document it in several places so that I never lose it.

Tara,
I wanted to send you and your family a note and tell you how sorry we are for your loss. As you know, your mom and dad have been our dear friends forever. Even though we haven't seen each other for a while, we still have that connection. I am so sorry and sad to lose such a good person.

Your mother was my mentor when it came to motherhood. She was there for me when I had my first son when we all lived in Homestead. She prepared me for everything. There was nothing during my pregnancy that came as a surprise because Jan left nothing unsaid. I knew what I did and didn't need, also when and where I should go to buy things. No question was too silly or ridiculous to ask her. And I even had Jillian to practice holding, feeding, etc.

Then we left for Japan where I had my second son. Although we she wasn't physically with me, she was with me in my heart. And all we had shared gave me the courage to try this motherhood thing again.

I have never met anybody who enjoyed being a mom so much and who was so willing to share her love with others. Jan taught me that laughter and tears were part of the pleasure that would come with this life-long job. Many years ago she gave me the confidence to be a good mother. But most of all she showed me to just plain be a "mom." For that I am forever grateful.

In recent years, we haven't been in touch as often. I suppose that is normal, too. But we were friends forever and when we did talk on the telephone it was like we have never been apart. I feel sad that I didn't call more often, especially these last few months. When I did speak to her she was always reassuring me that she felt well and not to worry about her.

(some other stuff about passing along her thoughts, how to keep in touch)

Comments

[Stinky]

What a great memory to have, and what a beautiful way to be remembered. I know I say this all the time, but your mom must've been a fabulous mother, because her daughter is an amazing person, and I'm sorry I never knew you while she was still living.

[Medha]

*hugs* What a beatiful gift to have...

[JillianB]

:) This is Pat right? I know it is. She still calls me on the anniversary of Mother's death.

It is so wonderful to know that she touched people and that they admired her for what she was best at...being a mother and a wonderful friend. I don't know if having her has made me the mom I am or if NOT having her has made me the mom I am. I think it's a little of both. As much as we miss her we were so lucky to have her while we did. I miss her terribly. I love you sis...more than you can imagine!!